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I came out to my parents and friends twenty years ago; just after I broke up with a boyfriend of two years because he was cheating on me. I was so heartbroken and just wanted someone to give me some comfort. Wrong idea. My parents thought I was so miserable and unhappy with my gay lifestyle and told me that I could come out of it if I wanted. They said no one was born gay and that I would soon forget the boyfriend that hurt me and also my gay lifestyle. They even went as far as to say that they could hook me up with a girl from the church. Oh brother!
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You should have waited until your heart was healed from the broken heart before telling your parents anything. Remember that they dont understand the gay lifestyle and wouldn't be able to know the difference between a heart that is broken and a miserable lifestyle. Wrong choice. -
You have to anticipate how your friends and parents will take the news. Some will appreciate that you are honest with them while others will see it as a betrayal that you kept it from them so long. So I guess it depends on the relationship that you have with each other. That should help you to decide which person to tell and when to tell each person.Comment
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If you have parents and frends who are conservative and religious, then you may have to keep your damn mouth shut. Let them figure it out for themselves. Keep your live as private as you want to. It is your life and you don't owe anyone anything, especially people who are judgmental and have a stick up their asses!Comment
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You might find some of your friends and family may want to know more. They may want to know when you knew you were gay and why it took so long for you to tell them. They may have intimate questions. You have to decide then how much of it you want to tell them and how much you want to keep to yourself.Comment
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Some people are so close minded when it comes to the gay lifestyle. They will call you a queer individual because you are different. You might have to cut off some of those friendships, but when it comes to your family members, that is different. So don't wait unti you are heartbroken to break this news. Yes, you want someone to talk to about it, but it is better to find solace with strangers or people in the gay community.Comment
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A heart break is not something to play with and I guess you wanted to see if you could get some comfort from your own kin. It is a pity that they didn't see that you needed to be comforted first before assuming that you were making a mistake with your life. Some people are just so insensitive, even if it is your family members. I am sorry you had to go through that.Comment
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Yes, it was a rough time, but I got over it. Now I am in my late forties and my parents and I have come to terms that the gay topic is off limits to them. I no longer discuss my lifestyle with them. I only talk about things like my career, my goals and other off topics. thanks for your understanding.Comment
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